How did this happen?!
My beautiful, positive, precious, loving baby girl, just weeks shy of her 6th birthday, has become a pre-teen! She can roll those eyes, huff, and stare daggers as well as any 12 year old out there!!!! I have already found myself telling Tim, “She’s going to hate me!” I thought I would have another 5 years any way!! Granted, she is not always like this. Most of the time she is my sweet, fun little buddy. But when this entirely-too-widely-accepted-in-the-world attitude shows up I am working on my game plan to show it who is boss!!! 🙂
It is of the utmost importance that correction/discipline not just address the behavior but the heart attitude as well. Let’s call this “the layered approach” to discipline. Mikaela is advanced beyond her years, and Tim and I have shared with her that when she receives a correction we do not merely want to hand out a consequence for her action, but we also want to make sure she learns something. For example:
Each day the kids have “quite time.” This typically means I put in a movie for them in their play room, and they are to stay in there and watch and rest until it is over. Mommy gets some much needed mid-day down time, Holden may get a nap, and Mikaela gets a chance to rest. This is a time in the day that my little movie buffs really look forward to. Well, a few days ago Mikaela chose to have a negative attitude and, although somewhat jokingly, spoke to me in a less than respectful way. (We’ve really been working on the virtue of thankfulness.)
We are big on letting our kids know that their attitude and actions are their choice, and a line I often use is, “You can’t make bad decisions and expect good things to happen.” So for this instance I told Mikaela that she would spend quiet time that day in her room with no movie. She was pretty upset about this, but let’s face it. Being alone in a room full of toys, books and art supplies is hardly a punishment! 🙂 But here is where the layering comes in. I gave her an assignment. Before she came out of her room at the end of quiet time she was to write, 5 times each, “I do not have to like everything, but I do have to keep a good attitude.” and a portion of Psalm 100:4 (AMP), which says, “Be thankful and say so!”
My prayer is that this approach will not simply teach her that if she’s rude she’ll get in trouble, but that it will also give her tools she can use for the rest of her life to combat the negative attitudes that so frequently vie for all of our minds.
All in all, Mikaela is incredible! I still love being with my little buddy, and I cannot believe that first grade begins in 15 days!!!!! She is growing so much in every way, and I am so proud of her. (And I tell her that often!) Here is a picture from our adventure last week when she mastered her first ever ropes course! 🙂 She was incredible!!!!
